


Habitual Regret

by KitSkit



Series: Painful Musings [2]
Category: Green Eggs and Ham (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Ongoing lie, Visions in dreams
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 04:47:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24547858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KitSkit/pseuds/KitSkit
Summary: Sam and Guy both had made decisions they wish they hadn't and gave advice they barely understood themselves. Despite this and the mishaps they often found themselves running away from, they kept gravitating towards solving everything together.
Series: Painful Musings [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1588711
Kudos: 7





	Habitual Regret

**Author's Note:**

  * For [automater](https://archiveofourown.org/users/automater/gifts).



> This story is dedicated to my earliest supporters. Thank you for enjoying my first story as I was writing it, automater, Eskie03, AJ_Illustrated, MelonMass, xAmaiBoo, Hewholaughsfirst, Juliana_1209, RoseColoredSeine, and AnimalSketches!
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Green Eggs and Ham or any of the characters mentioned. This story is non-profit.

"Guy, wake up! Guy? Guy, come on! It's the big day!"

Guy rolled over with a groan and checked his alarm clock. 

6 A.M. 

Their train didn't arrive until 8:35.

"Sam, why are you waking me this early?"

Sam tugged Guy's arm in response. 

"I've got a surprise! Come see!"

Sam lead them into the kitchen. The kitchen table was decked out in all sorts of breakfast food. There were three kinds of jam, mountains of green eggs and ham, and pitchers of sweet truffala juice, even the pink kind. 

"I made you breakfast!"

Guy felt he could cry. 

"Sam, thank you. I appreciate this. Go sit down. I'll join you in a bit."

Sam was confused before Guy made a phone symbol with his hand. He nodded and ate to his heart's content. 

"Hi, Mom. I-uh-wanted to remind you that we'll be there in about three days. Oh, you want us to stay until Windsday? I, um-"

Guy looked to Sam for confirmation. Sam rolled his eyes and nodded, as if to say 'of course, why wouldn't I want to'.

"-okay. I'll let my boss know. I've done overtime. It's fine. See you soon."

Guy took a seat at the dining table and chuckled when he noticed Sam's empty plate.

"Hungry, weren't you?"

Sam nodded. 

"I've been prepping for hours!"

"Well if you've worked so hard on it I'm sure it's great. You're the best cook I know."

Guy ruffled Sam's headfeathers. That seemed to be his go-to friendship gesture. Sam grinned from ear to ear. 

"Thank you. Speaking of which, I wanted to tell you."

Sam reached into his hat, picked up a form, and placed it in front of Guy. Guy read the top. 

"Sam, you've applied at Donna's! That's great."

Sam placed the form back under his hat. 

"I know! She said that if she accepted me, she would have to put me as waiter. I'm grateful she's considering it."

Sam shoved another forkful of green eggs into his mouth. 

"So, enough about me, Am-I. Tell me about Am-you. What's new?" 

Guy was confused on what to say. He'd, surprisingly, not talked to Michellee in a few weeks. The last time he'd really thought about her was at the jewelry store yesterday. 

"Um-well, not much really. I've been working a lot. You know that."

He was unsure whether he should tell Sam about his plans or not. His friend wasn't very stealthy. 

"Oh, come on. Tell me what's going on in that noggin of yours."

"Well, it's kind of personal, Sam."

"Promise I won't tell a soul."

Guy sighed, not sure about how he would exactly approach this. He'd never surprised anyone before.

"Alright, um, close your eyes."

Guy walked back into the kitchen and reached for a box in the top drawer. He opened it and cleared his throat. 

When Sam opened his eyes, he gasped so loudly Guy swore birds flew out of trees from towns over. 

"You're going to propose?!"

"Shh, Sam! You're going to wake the neighbors! Wait-are you crying?"

Sam bounced up and down in his chair.

"This is amazing! When's the wedding? Oh, I could hook you up with this tailor I know from Flo! And these guys from the radio station. DJ Please Don't Leave Me knows me personally!"

"Really? I thought that was just a hallucination in the cab."

Sam looked up from his scrapbook of ideas that had materialized out of thin air.

"Nope, all real. Just like these dinergoers I know, Mary and Lee! They made their own cake for their wedding. It was like a dream! Oh, that should be the theme: cloud wedding! With vegan green eggs and-"

"Sam. It's my wedding and you seem more excited than me. Slow down a bit. I don't even know how I'm going to propose."

"Oh! Well that's no trouble at all. We can plan right after our--oh, oh no!"

Sam shot out of his seat, tucking his scrapbook under his arm. 

Guy suddenly noticed the clock. 

6:45 AM.

"Son of a yip!"

After frantically packing their briefcases and running as fast as they could, they reached the station. 

They walked up to the ticket collector with their bruckles and beaming pride. They'd made it with 20 minutes to spare.

At least they thought so before the doors started to close without them inside the train. Sam got inside by the skin of his teeth, but before Guy could, the doors closed. 

He was stuck between the doors. Sam could hardly contain his laughter. The visual of the conductor stopping the train and trying to push Guy through the doors didn't help things. 

Once Guy finally walked down the cart hallway, he felt everyone staring at him. He felt like a bad joke gone wrong. 

When they finally entered their cart and closed the door, Sam let his laughter loose. 

"Pfft-oh my god, Guy! I didn't think that was even possible! Y-you have some serious bad luck!"

"Yeah, yeah, rub it in."

"I thought you'd be stuck there forever-oh my god, I just about died!"

"That's enough, Sam."

"Ah, my sides!"

When Sam calmed down, he reached into his briefcase for his scrapbook. He found a stray chickeraffe feather. 

"Hey, Guy, look at this."

"Still have some of those lying around? What's it been? 9 months now?"

"I'd reckon so. Have you visited him?" Sam said, waving the feather around as he spoke. 

Guy looked down in shame for a moment. 

"I-no, I haven't actually. To tell you the truth, I haven't really thought about Jenkins for a while. I'm only really reminded when E.B brings him up."

Instead of the offended look Guy suspected, Sam nodded in understanding. 

"Yeah, I honestly haven't either. It makes sense, though. He's with his real family now."

Sam held up his I-Am-Am-I's photo of Guy, himself, and Jenkins.

"It was nice to have him as part of ours, though."

"Yeah. Speaking of which, um-"

Guy paused, wondering if asking about this was okay. He figured that he would never find out if he didn't ask now, though. 

"-do you have any money saved over to, um, take E.B to see Jenkins? You mentioned it before-"

Sam's immediate change in expression caught Guy off guard and cut his point short. Guy felt his chest close in dread. 

"No, Guy, I don't. I never will. Forget it."

Sam stood up and forced the cart door open. 

"Anyway, I'll get us some snacks from the dining car, 'cause lord knows I want no part in this conversation, and sure it would be great to hear more of your real insightful questions but-"

"Sam, I really think we should-"

"-can't talk! Gotta go! Bye!"

Slam!

Guy sighed, laying his forehead on his hand. His head ached. 

He pulled his paint-watching case out of his briefcase and headed for the quiet car. He hoped Sam would settle down by the time he came back.


End file.
